1 year ago
# ((masterdoctor feels))
[Once the Master sticks his hand in his trouser pocket, he’ll find a folded up piece of paper. Once he opens it, he’ll find it’s a letter.]
It seems nothing I do will ever convince you how much I care, and maybe I deserve that. It doesn’t really matter, it doesn’t change how much I love you, and it won’t stop me from trying to show you. You seem to think it’s the others, or it’s Rory, or it’s my companions or whoever else, but it’s not. It’s only ever been you, ever since the day I met you. It’ll only ever be you.
Maybe one day I’ll be able to make up for everything I’ve done. Maybe there will be a day when you can look at me with something other than resentment. At the very least, maybe one day, I can tell you I love you and I won’t be answered with a look of suspicion.
I don’t even know where you end and I begin. You’ve shaped so much of me. Every significant twist or turn in who I am was all because of you. We’ll always be tangled up in one another, I think, and I’ve learned I don’t want it any other way.
You’ve never needed me, but I’ve always needed you. Still do, always will. I’m sorry it took me so long to figure it out. I owe you so much. I owe you everything, you know. And I try to be good to you, I really do. I’m sorry I fall short so often, but what can I do other than try? I want you to know I’m making an honest effort. I just want you to be happy. The more selfish part of me wants to be what makes you happy, but as long as you are happy, I don’t have to be the cause.
And I know you’re not. It hurts, to see you in so much pain. I wish I could help, and I try my best to help, but I don’t know how. If I could take away all your pain and take it onto myself, I would.
I want you to know I’m here for you. I’m not going anywhere, never again. Do what you have to at your own pace, I’ll be right here when you decide to come back home.
Please take care of yourself. You are so loved, and by nobody else more than me.
The Master awoke the next evening, more than well rested and slightly disoriented from sleep. It took him a few minutes to reset his tolerance levels to their normal maximum and got up. He was considering asking Giacomo to assist him in finding a tailor as he moved across the room to get dressed for the day.
He found the note as he was pushing his pockets in as they were attempting to come to the outside of his trousers. As he read it, he found himself needing to take a seat on the edge of the bed. As he finished, he let out a sigh and then reread it a few more times.
This was definitely an interesting read, but the Doctor was wrong on a few things. Namely, the Master really did adore him. He wouldn’t have tried to lure him in as much as he did if he hadn’t. Though it was somewhat nice to see this in his own hand. The note was carefully folded and the Master set of to go speak to him.